Hola yall --
Wanna know a secret? I have horrible short term memory. Basically I can be thinking about something and then... umm... crap! I had a thought I was gonna say, but I cant remember what it was.
I can literally be standing in one room, have a thought, walk to the next room, and the thought will have completely disappeared from my head. Gone. Its incredibly frustrating because sometimes theyre good thoughts, sometimes theyre important thoughts, but... I just cant remember. Sometimes theyll eventually show up again, but not quickly. And alot of the time, not when I can do anything about them.
A couple days ago I was in the shower, and I had thought of something I wanted to check on the computer when I got out. I turned around to reach for the soap, turned back around to face the water and... I had totally forgotten what I wanted to do. The thought still has not come back to me.
If this was something new for me, I think Id be a bit worried, but Ive had this problem for as long as I can remember. Ha! Theres kind of a joke there. And its only the short term memory that I have issues with. My long term is just fine. I can recall events, conversations, pretty much anything... as long as it didnt happen in the past two minutes.
I dont suppose theres a cure, or any other sort of help for this is there? And if there is, can someone write it down for me instead of whispering it in my ear, just my luck, Ill forget it.
Til next time...
-- DBW --
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Vanity
"I hope you have dental insurance."
Who would have thunk that a simple sentence would come back to haunt me, and as soon as it did even.
One of my favorite candies growing up was "Bottlecaps." And if you dont know what these are, or if you do not like them, then I dont know how we can be friends. Bottlecaps are incredible pieces of sugary goodness flavored like soda pop. You have your typical candy flavors of orange, strawberry, and grape, but what makes these candies so awesome is root beer and cola. Simply yummy.
Well it had been awhile since I had some, so I picked up a box at the store one day and got re-hooked. Maybe more like addicted. And in the following two weeks, I consumed roughly a dozen theatre size boxes of them. Addicted indeed.
Now, flash back to about two years ago. Blanca and I went to the beach, the first and only time in our relationship that we ever did so. We were in the water, playing in the waves, and a mighty big one was heading towards us. Nothing dangerous, just a big one to have fun with.
She was standing in front of me, as as the wave approached, she jumped up into the air. Unfortunately for me, her head smacked into my chin, cracking my teeth together, chipping one of the front ones.
For two years I lived with the chipped tooth, not really thinking anything of it. Not really thinking if I should be eating this or that, just going about my normal eating habits. Perhaps that was a mistake. Perhaps my eating habits had nothing to do with what was about to happen.
Flash back even further than the beach incident. Go back, maybe three or four years. Honestly, I forget exactly when, but thats the rough time frame.
I went to the dentist to have some work done. The guy was super nice, and after the first appointment with him, I would have been thrilled if he stayed my regular dentist forever. That was not to be the case, and my opinion of him was about to change.
After one of the follow up appointments I got home to notice, upon smiling at myself in the mirror, that my two front teeth had been filed down. Without my consent. Without even talking to me first. The guy just took it upon himself to do it. If he had done a decent job, I wouldnt have had issue, but he kinda filed em too far and not exactly evenly. In the process, my right front tooth ended up damaged. The same tooth that would become chipped in the Pacific.
Did I complain to the dentist about his shoddy, unapproved, work? Well, I would have except that I went to my next appointment only to find that the entire office had packed up and left. No, seriously, they were gone and nobody knew where they went to. Oh well.
So, we start with bad dental work, we continue to a chipped tooth at the beach, and we continue even more to an addiction to the sugary bliss of Bottlecaps. But where does it all lead?
Well, two Fridays ago, Im laying in bed and I bit down onto something and, that chipped part of my tooth finally broke away. In all honesty, its not a huge missing piece, but its a divot and to me its huge. And because it exists, I tend not to smile as much. And if Im talking to someone I just know theyre staring right at it. It has made me even more self conscious than I already was. And now I fear food and have started to shy away from certain things scared I might mess it up some more. I hope I wont be like this forever.
One final flash back. This time to the sixth grade. Yeah, that far back. Were all on the grass playing field hockey and I was running behind a kid after the ball and he went to take a shot and the follow through of his stick smacked me in the side of the head, causing two different injuries - a deviated septum and a, for lack of a proper term, misaligned jaw.
Because of the jaw injury, Ive always been reluctant to take pictures, or even to look people straight on. Thats why even when I do take pictures, youll rarely see me smile. So for those of you that have wondered why I always look so "pissed off" there ya go.
So now I have a misaligned jaw, a tooth with a divot, and I appear to be guilty of the original and most serious of the seven deadly sins... vanity. Oh well, one down, six to go.
Until next time...
-- DBW --
Who would have thunk that a simple sentence would come back to haunt me, and as soon as it did even.
One of my favorite candies growing up was "Bottlecaps." And if you dont know what these are, or if you do not like them, then I dont know how we can be friends. Bottlecaps are incredible pieces of sugary goodness flavored like soda pop. You have your typical candy flavors of orange, strawberry, and grape, but what makes these candies so awesome is root beer and cola. Simply yummy.
Well it had been awhile since I had some, so I picked up a box at the store one day and got re-hooked. Maybe more like addicted. And in the following two weeks, I consumed roughly a dozen theatre size boxes of them. Addicted indeed.
Now, flash back to about two years ago. Blanca and I went to the beach, the first and only time in our relationship that we ever did so. We were in the water, playing in the waves, and a mighty big one was heading towards us. Nothing dangerous, just a big one to have fun with.
She was standing in front of me, as as the wave approached, she jumped up into the air. Unfortunately for me, her head smacked into my chin, cracking my teeth together, chipping one of the front ones.
For two years I lived with the chipped tooth, not really thinking anything of it. Not really thinking if I should be eating this or that, just going about my normal eating habits. Perhaps that was a mistake. Perhaps my eating habits had nothing to do with what was about to happen.
Flash back even further than the beach incident. Go back, maybe three or four years. Honestly, I forget exactly when, but thats the rough time frame.
I went to the dentist to have some work done. The guy was super nice, and after the first appointment with him, I would have been thrilled if he stayed my regular dentist forever. That was not to be the case, and my opinion of him was about to change.
After one of the follow up appointments I got home to notice, upon smiling at myself in the mirror, that my two front teeth had been filed down. Without my consent. Without even talking to me first. The guy just took it upon himself to do it. If he had done a decent job, I wouldnt have had issue, but he kinda filed em too far and not exactly evenly. In the process, my right front tooth ended up damaged. The same tooth that would become chipped in the Pacific.
Did I complain to the dentist about his shoddy, unapproved, work? Well, I would have except that I went to my next appointment only to find that the entire office had packed up and left. No, seriously, they were gone and nobody knew where they went to. Oh well.
So, we start with bad dental work, we continue to a chipped tooth at the beach, and we continue even more to an addiction to the sugary bliss of Bottlecaps. But where does it all lead?
Well, two Fridays ago, Im laying in bed and I bit down onto something and, that chipped part of my tooth finally broke away. In all honesty, its not a huge missing piece, but its a divot and to me its huge. And because it exists, I tend not to smile as much. And if Im talking to someone I just know theyre staring right at it. It has made me even more self conscious than I already was. And now I fear food and have started to shy away from certain things scared I might mess it up some more. I hope I wont be like this forever.
One final flash back. This time to the sixth grade. Yeah, that far back. Were all on the grass playing field hockey and I was running behind a kid after the ball and he went to take a shot and the follow through of his stick smacked me in the side of the head, causing two different injuries - a deviated septum and a, for lack of a proper term, misaligned jaw.
Because of the jaw injury, Ive always been reluctant to take pictures, or even to look people straight on. Thats why even when I do take pictures, youll rarely see me smile. So for those of you that have wondered why I always look so "pissed off" there ya go.
So now I have a misaligned jaw, a tooth with a divot, and I appear to be guilty of the original and most serious of the seven deadly sins... vanity. Oh well, one down, six to go.
Until next time...
-- DBW --
Friday, January 25, 2008
To cheat, or not to cheat
I had a conversation with myself today and I figured why not share it with yall --
Lets suppose that on the eve of the first day of school the principal found that one of the students... lets call him Billy... had cheated and got all the answers to every test the school was going to have for the year. And lets suppose that the principal felt he had no choice but to punish Billy to such a degree that the school had never seen anything like it in its history.
Lets jump ahead to the last week of school, theres one test left to go, and looking back all at the previous ones, we see that Billy had not missed a single question and has gotten 100% on each and every test.
Would that surprise you that he had aced every test considering that he had already been caught cheating right before the school year started? And would it bug you that hes now being called the smartest kid in school, and will probably get an award for it?
If I had to stop and think about things, I think I might find that Im more upset for the praise being heaped upon little Billy Belichik than I am for the praise heaped upon his Patriots.
"The players still have to go out and play the game."
Its because of that that I dont necessarily hate the Patriots as much as I feel sorry for them. Granted, the players still have to go out and execute, but their coach already knows the answers to the questions, so even if the Patriots were awesome in their own right, theyre being placed in positions, in plays, that the coach knows will work - theyre benefiting from their coaches cheating, and thus, unfortunately, are cheaters themselves.
"But youre missing the point, even if they cheated, that didnt mean they knew everything that was going to happen in the game."
Very true, but there were a handful of games this year that the Patriots barely came out ahead in. The Giants, Colts, Ravens, Chargers, and Jets all had the Patriots within defeat, only to fall short themselves. And yes, I said the Jets. The Jets of New York lost to the awesome Patriots of New England by a mere 10 points. Those 10 points seem like nothing compared to how much the Patriots were beating other teams by.
So, even if all the answers werent known ahead of time, all it takes is one - one answer, one play - to push ahead. And what if, because of cheating, that one answer was the one to help them pull out a victory in a game they should have lost? And theres no way of knowing for sure one way or the other. So just because they didnt know all the answers, is that A+ still hard earned? Of course not.
So while the Patriots, by default, are cheaters, and Billy Belichick is unquestionably one, why does everyone continue to bow down to them when they walk by? Super Bowl victory or not, their "accomplishments" this year deserve as big an asterisk as anything Barry Bonds has done. Kinda sucks for them considering that this could have been the best year in NFL history, instead, it just proves again that cheaters do win.
-- DBW --
Lets suppose that on the eve of the first day of school the principal found that one of the students... lets call him Billy... had cheated and got all the answers to every test the school was going to have for the year. And lets suppose that the principal felt he had no choice but to punish Billy to such a degree that the school had never seen anything like it in its history.
Lets jump ahead to the last week of school, theres one test left to go, and looking back all at the previous ones, we see that Billy had not missed a single question and has gotten 100% on each and every test.
Would that surprise you that he had aced every test considering that he had already been caught cheating right before the school year started? And would it bug you that hes now being called the smartest kid in school, and will probably get an award for it?
If I had to stop and think about things, I think I might find that Im more upset for the praise being heaped upon little Billy Belichik than I am for the praise heaped upon his Patriots.
"The players still have to go out and play the game."
Its because of that that I dont necessarily hate the Patriots as much as I feel sorry for them. Granted, the players still have to go out and execute, but their coach already knows the answers to the questions, so even if the Patriots were awesome in their own right, theyre being placed in positions, in plays, that the coach knows will work - theyre benefiting from their coaches cheating, and thus, unfortunately, are cheaters themselves.
"But youre missing the point, even if they cheated, that didnt mean they knew everything that was going to happen in the game."
Very true, but there were a handful of games this year that the Patriots barely came out ahead in. The Giants, Colts, Ravens, Chargers, and Jets all had the Patriots within defeat, only to fall short themselves. And yes, I said the Jets. The Jets of New York lost to the awesome Patriots of New England by a mere 10 points. Those 10 points seem like nothing compared to how much the Patriots were beating other teams by.
So, even if all the answers werent known ahead of time, all it takes is one - one answer, one play - to push ahead. And what if, because of cheating, that one answer was the one to help them pull out a victory in a game they should have lost? And theres no way of knowing for sure one way or the other. So just because they didnt know all the answers, is that A+ still hard earned? Of course not.
So while the Patriots, by default, are cheaters, and Billy Belichick is unquestionably one, why does everyone continue to bow down to them when they walk by? Super Bowl victory or not, their "accomplishments" this year deserve as big an asterisk as anything Barry Bonds has done. Kinda sucks for them considering that this could have been the best year in NFL history, instead, it just proves again that cheaters do win.
-- DBW --
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Whats Xenu with Will Smith?
Yo --
So, it appears that Mr William Smith is now in cahoots with the vanilla midget Tom Cruise. Obscure wrestling reference thrown in for the heck of it.
http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2008/01/09/2008-01-09_will_smith_boosting_scientology.html
Ok, so he says hes not a Scientologist, but just that hes a student of the world and Scientology is 98% of the same teachings as the Bible, Hinduism, and Buddhism. Now, if youre like me, youd say thats 98% of a bunch of not that much anyway, but I digress.
He also gave his cast mates a card for a personality test at their favorite Scientology Center. A test, which is free anyway. Why not just give a "Get Out Of Jail Free" card from Monopoly? Each is worth exactly the same.
Anyway, I went to IMDB.com and took some of Will Smiths projects and replaced a word in the title with the word "Xenu" and hilarity ensued. Laugh along with me, wont you...
Seven Xenus
I Am Xenu
The Pursuit Of Xenu
Xenu Tale
I, Xenu
All Of Xenu
Bad Xenu and Bad Xenu 2
Xenu In Black or the porn version Men In Xenu
Xenu
Xenu Day
The Xenu Of Bel Air
Six Degrees Of Xenu
Xenu In America
Where The Xenu Takes You
The Perfect Xenu
Xenu & Cookies
Xenu Hunter
The Secret Life Of Xenu
The Xenu Contract
Saving Xenu
Xenu Or Die
And who can forget his start as part of the rap duo DJ Jazzy Xenu and The Fresh Prince?
Ah Willy, what the Hell man, what the Hell?
-- DBW --
So, it appears that Mr William Smith is now in cahoots with the vanilla midget Tom Cruise. Obscure wrestling reference thrown in for the heck of it.
http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2008/01/09/2008-01-09_will_smith_boosting_scientology.html
Ok, so he says hes not a Scientologist, but just that hes a student of the world and Scientology is 98% of the same teachings as the Bible, Hinduism, and Buddhism. Now, if youre like me, youd say thats 98% of a bunch of not that much anyway, but I digress.
He also gave his cast mates a card for a personality test at their favorite Scientology Center. A test, which is free anyway. Why not just give a "Get Out Of Jail Free" card from Monopoly? Each is worth exactly the same.
Anyway, I went to IMDB.com and took some of Will Smiths projects and replaced a word in the title with the word "Xenu" and hilarity ensued. Laugh along with me, wont you...
Seven Xenus
I Am Xenu
The Pursuit Of Xenu
Xenu Tale
I, Xenu
All Of Xenu
Bad Xenu and Bad Xenu 2
Xenu In Black or the porn version Men In Xenu
Xenu
Xenu Day
The Xenu Of Bel Air
Six Degrees Of Xenu
Xenu In America
Where The Xenu Takes You
The Perfect Xenu
Xenu & Cookies
Xenu Hunter
The Secret Life Of Xenu
The Xenu Contract
Saving Xenu
Xenu Or Die
And who can forget his start as part of the rap duo DJ Jazzy Xenu and The Fresh Prince?
Ah Willy, what the Hell man, what the Hell?
-- DBW --
Saturday, January 05, 2008
2007 - Year In Review
Happy New Year --
Well, 2007 has come and gone, and nows as good a time as any to look back and see what I did... or didnt do.
Unlike last time, I did not keep track of all the food I ate. It was too much work, and it was kinda scary looking back and seeing all the crap I consumed. So, done with that. But this is what I did keep track of:
Books. I read 6 of em. Thats one every two months, and 5 more than I read in 2006.
Movies. I watched 109 of them in 2007, three dozen more than the year before. Thats a very rough, 1 every 3 days, and I probably watched so many considering that I didnt really go anywhere. Which brings us to...
Places. In 2006 I went to 55 places. Not really alot, but on average, once every 6 days. In 2007 I went to 42 places, or one every 8 days.
If we only look at the places I went with Blanca - minus vacation - then in 2006 I went to 47 places, or one every 7 days. In 2007 I went to 28 places, or once every two weeks.
So there we go. 2007 in review. Hopefully 2008 will be filled with more fun than last year. Well, it cant get worse... right?
-- DBW --
Well, 2007 has come and gone, and nows as good a time as any to look back and see what I did... or didnt do.
Unlike last time, I did not keep track of all the food I ate. It was too much work, and it was kinda scary looking back and seeing all the crap I consumed. So, done with that. But this is what I did keep track of:
Books. I read 6 of em. Thats one every two months, and 5 more than I read in 2006.
Movies. I watched 109 of them in 2007, three dozen more than the year before. Thats a very rough, 1 every 3 days, and I probably watched so many considering that I didnt really go anywhere. Which brings us to...
Places. In 2006 I went to 55 places. Not really alot, but on average, once every 6 days. In 2007 I went to 42 places, or one every 8 days.
If we only look at the places I went with Blanca - minus vacation - then in 2006 I went to 47 places, or one every 7 days. In 2007 I went to 28 places, or once every two weeks.
So there we go. 2007 in review. Hopefully 2008 will be filled with more fun than last year. Well, it cant get worse... right?
-- DBW --
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Stupid
Happy two weeks before Christmas to yall --
So, Im watching tv and theres a commercial for Lowes, I think, and theres a guy who walks up to a female employee and asks her to pretend to be his wife while he went shopping for her. Perhaps youve seen this?
Anywho, they walk around the store and he picks up item after item in a "Hey honey, look what I got you!!!" sort of way and no matter what he picks up the employee looks at him with a disgusted look like "You cant be serious?!"
In the background you can see a good portion of the store, and I cant see a single thing in there that I would buy for my girlfriend. Nothing. No tools, no hardware, no nothing. Id get slapped upside the head if I wrapped anything up from there and tried to pass it off as a gift for her.
But thats not the worst part. Again, despite it not being a "girl" store, and despite the female employee being totally embarrassed and disgusted that this guy would even come to this store for a gift for his wife, the two of them finally settle on the perfect gift... a gift card.
Did you get that? The female employee basically told the guy "Youre an idiot for shopping here for your wife, she wont like anything you pick out from here, and youd be lucky to "get some" ever again if you do... so just go ahead and buy her a gift card. From here. So she can come in and not see anything she wants to buy."
It would be like me getting my best, straight, guy friend a gift card to Victorias Secret. Why? Hed never use it and Id look like an idiot. So how exactly do these commercials get green lit? How can the concept get past a room full of people whos job it is to discard nonsensical crap like this?
I digress. I shall scratch my head no more for this being on the air since nobody scratched theirs before it got there.
Til next time...
-- DBW --
So, Im watching tv and theres a commercial for Lowes, I think, and theres a guy who walks up to a female employee and asks her to pretend to be his wife while he went shopping for her. Perhaps youve seen this?
Anywho, they walk around the store and he picks up item after item in a "Hey honey, look what I got you!!!" sort of way and no matter what he picks up the employee looks at him with a disgusted look like "You cant be serious?!"
In the background you can see a good portion of the store, and I cant see a single thing in there that I would buy for my girlfriend. Nothing. No tools, no hardware, no nothing. Id get slapped upside the head if I wrapped anything up from there and tried to pass it off as a gift for her.
But thats not the worst part. Again, despite it not being a "girl" store, and despite the female employee being totally embarrassed and disgusted that this guy would even come to this store for a gift for his wife, the two of them finally settle on the perfect gift... a gift card.
Did you get that? The female employee basically told the guy "Youre an idiot for shopping here for your wife, she wont like anything you pick out from here, and youd be lucky to "get some" ever again if you do... so just go ahead and buy her a gift card. From here. So she can come in and not see anything she wants to buy."
It would be like me getting my best, straight, guy friend a gift card to Victorias Secret. Why? Hed never use it and Id look like an idiot. So how exactly do these commercials get green lit? How can the concept get past a room full of people whos job it is to discard nonsensical crap like this?
I digress. I shall scratch my head no more for this being on the air since nobody scratched theirs before it got there.
Til next time...
-- DBW --
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